The Wall

Pernicious habits I seek to destroy,

Inquire my reasons a pseudo decoy,

Prevaricate around for the truth defines,

Morose of late yet my will declines,

Thoughts focus on all who sleep at night,

As I lay awake with eyes full of spite,

Brush away the feeling by building a wall,

To separate me from all those who call,

Jeering whispers seep through the cracks,

Stabbing with abasement I cannot relax,

Creeping cooling the bricks I lay,

Stone is heavy yet I pile the fray,

Why bother to think of suicidal brink,

The crime is punishment enough to sink,

Unruly demeanor with nonchalant glimmer,

Glisten in the light a sword naked in rage,

Blood stains are fresh a wild dog in a cage,

Sheathe the fury to keep the blade at bay,

Far too dangerous to live that way,

Brilliant explosion brings praise from sheep,

Too green to know what sorrow I reap,

So long goodbye maybe one day we will see eye to eye

Deathwish

Each step holds a mystery that's new to me,

Reap the rewards yet it all falls drearily,

Can't quite quench the quintessential thirst,

Is this all there is to my existence,

A pursuit of an end to which I will transcend,

Transport to a plane of mundane but I refrain,

Borders on insane but I still play the game,

Doses to my brain of alcohol so vain,

No matter how inebriated I be I still see,

The scanner darkly I only want a visual clearly,

Venom dirges plague yet I carry on to save,

Redeem that spark that I once saw yet so dark,

Filled with animosity to the constant hypocrisy,

Want one thing yet claim to love another,

Smother the sin with the wicked burdens within,

Sometimes I think a deathwish on the brink,

Perhaps the end will justify the means,

Tearing me apart at the seams,

Pull it slow for I will echo below,

A shadow stalking with harmless talking,

Yet it repels all acquisition calm precision,

I laugh at the offense yet hate still relents,

Stabbing my heart like a dart false start,

Spread the love but it falls see through,

Transparent to the apparent abhorrent,

Maybe one day it will make sense,

The devil fosters torrents till I break currents

First day on the job

Awake after short slumber thoughts tumble,

Rise to the moonlit bike ride steady stride,

Headlights daze my vision brutal collision,

Earphones blaring sounds soul baring,

Bushes stir to my left I jump at the prospect,

Just the same figure of stone cold trigger,

Arrive to the task with my key empty flask,

Alarm springs cacophony why is this happening,

They gave me the key for entry but no way to calm sentry,

Get on the phone to call for help throw me a bone,

Ring after ring no answer 3 am is a cancer,

Finally I get a response but alarm cancels with taunts,

The line is dead so I grab the cell to my head,

Once again reach connection but realize dire section,

Cops pull into parking lot with guns strapped to blow me up,

Don't shoot I work here never mind my dark exterior,

Heat at the ready they shout get the fuck out,

Near fatal mistake I walk into their guns life forsake,

They back up in a panic screaming WO WO all frantic,

Hand them my cell to prevent shortcut to hell,

Manager straightens up the confusion calm persuasion,

I get the alarm code and am scolded for god who knows,

Heart racing a million miles a minute all up in it,

Now it's time to start my shift all the shit I put up with

Silent War

Stir up this stew with a wooden spoon,

Splinters break off and spell my doom,

Spark the pilot to heat up this anger,

Bottled up till now I sense danger,

Play off my rhythm skeletal schism,

View clouded through vortex prism,

A glass to an end it seeks to spend,

Pour away the tired will descend,

One day in the distant future I see,

All that is dealt will die before me,

Or will I go first sickening thirst,

Regardless of it all I fly but stall,

Engines overloaded commence free fall,

Administer gases to calm the thrall,

Lashes rip against a granite wall,

Bashes of my head I shake when they call,

Useless to fight give in to the plight,

Acquiesce defeat and say they were right,

For the sake of sanity discontinue calamity,

Meet my maker and whatever they plan for me

Sanctuary

Take me back to a time long ago,

Trapped in a cell of blackened snow,

Crystals form on the roof of my memory,

Slanting awkward with poisonous symphony,

Sit and speculate what path I will take,

Reclining while I wander in wonder's wake,

Take a break from this forlorn task,

Escape to my sanctuary of cleansing glass,

Surpass the worries that plague within,

Exhale the sorrow that comes with sin,

Listless for a while but it slowly fades,

Apathy to all things the iron curtain saves,

Drawn over thick the safety of it all,

Ignore the time that I must watch to fall,

I shall enjoy this moment with a clear head,

Before I return to the task which I dread,

Relax and listen for the music is bliss,

Strums a chord in my soul I will miss,

Play it over in my mind even after I depart,

Ghastly ghouls take turns to tear me apart,

Over too soon I want to stay longer in this cocoon,

But I know it is time to wake from this dream,

To walk down this road and all those between

Mask of Defeat

A show of courage to mask defeat,

Ample persona to a stolid retreat,

Escape in dreams to break through with force,

Subtle signs the mind steers on course,

Close proximity where normally so far,

The enormity of calamity I cannot mar,

The face that is shown is only a glimmer,

The truth of self slowly grows dimmer,

Change the innocence to abrupt corrupt,

A caged malevolence will soon erupt,

It is the face on the surface that we show,

Others will see what we want them to know,

A lie to oneself is the greatest mistake,

Be true to your instincts or forever forsake